Saturday, 30 August 2014

An hour of beat with gentle passing day.

Its no easy to pass by the gentle days,
It's harder each hour.
May not know how hard,
But it's difficult that it even give me a cramp right on my thought; i am so lost without you.
An hour of beat passes, and a dark slowly swallow the gentle night.
The birds start chirping louder and then fainter each second,
Everything soothes down slowly.
But my thoughts was same as what it was like when i wake up.
Where,I started to miss you from the early morning,
And right there i want to get back near to you,
Right next to you; where i wanted to keep watching you smiling with love.
Without you, i am so lost.
Without you everything is so tasteless, charmless and dry.
It's all you who set heaven for me.
For thy absence, i am so lost.
what ever i do, where ever i go,  the first thing that keeps coming to my mind is always YOU. you're like the first ray of sunlight that show to me.
i miss you more.

Tuesday, 12 August 2014


.. very early morning, I woke up, got dressed into fine collar and chinos, collected lap coat from drawer and picked practical book from my study table to go to class, Suddenly my usual day work changed its course though it wasn't  unexpected..........
Starting from last night, repeatedly I was requested by one of my friend to help one brother who came from Bhutan to New Delhi to process his visa card for master study in United Kingdom as there is no facility accessible in Bhutan.  At the very first instant of his request , I denied with all silly excuses about my classes and my tough semester, in fact the reason is more and yeah I do have to attend classes regularly, as it’s bit a difficult semester for me unlike my first and second year of my course. But he didn't really took into consideration, suddenly a thought popped in my mind wondering why he can’t go and help him rather making a big branches of chain and after few minutes of our pause, “ tashi, choe ghi dhi VISA tshu process bey ni ghi korley shey lo mena, atshi help bey jin oi”  he told me to help him. I was by then left with no other choices than to let him know and explain about my condition this days; where I am financially broke , and that was the reason why I kept denying, still then I don’t know what was wrong, he had a more addition on it and somehow without finalizing anything, we went off to sleep.
The very next morning I was about to go to class, but suddenly I was stopped by yesterday’s undone stuff. I denied again saying and explaining everything to my friend thinking at least he will understand my situation better, but he didn't take any heed. I felt so childish denying and explaining to him time and again, and moreover felt sorry for that brother who came to process VISA and finally made my mind to go and help him to do his work, gathering all my strength, gathering all my power, standing tall even if I am financially broke. Actually what my thought was, ‘at least I must have some amount to help him move place to place, even If I can’t offer any big and special help, because I am the one who is staying here in Delhi and won’t face any problem as it’s my second home for now and he has just came for the VISA processing and would cost him a lot moving up and down, here and there’ thus reasonably I was weakened even If I want to help.
By around 9 am in the morning, by auto I took him to Axis bank which is located in CR park, greater kailaish, a few kilometer east from my university to deposit his fees for the VISA charges with referring to my fresh idea which I got a week ago after helping to process one of my relatives VISA and as he said me that, he can deposit from any international credit card, but as we reach their sadly the axis bank wasn't doing the fee payment and receiving for United kingdom VISA applicant. By then after few minute we headed to Trade tower, located in Nehru place where the appointment for all type VISA are done there  to ask the specific banks where he can deposit as he can’t access to online payment, but  they didn't give any clear idea, rather a short cut to go back to try again for online payment.
Once again we came back to the internet cafe’ to make online payment which nearly takes 20 to 30 minutes, there I stayed sitting outside waiting and wishing his work to be successful while he was processing his work, suddenly from nowhere again a thought of my last night and today morning situations came back flooding and I was just made to think, questioned myself and it was almost like monologue with my thoughts and constants nod with regard to a life and it’s challenge. That very time, thought of life has bothered me too much to the extent that I was lost in the midst of crowded city watching people walking here and there in the scorching sun, I was lost looking at those stray people begging, I was lost in random activities and reactive thoughts and I was just smiling to myself that, life is a real challenge that keep testing us .By then it was already 2 pm and I was still waiting for him, and a few minute later, his voice came saying , ‘bro, what shall we do now?  It’s again unsuccessful’ and yeah by that time we are left with no choice other than to make call to sir who deals with the VISA processing’s to ask for help and luckily he asked us to come up to discuss the matter. By then we walked to the main road to catch auto for going to Bhutan embassy which was located in race course, which nearly take more than an hour. Suddenly, as we pass down the street, I found a script lying on the dirty ground with just few sentence clear to my eyes, which states; “strength is life and weakness is death” and something like…power and all…and that very time, I felt that, that was an answer to life.  Because, most of us have the capacity to do, the most of us has the ability to fight, but the problem is just because of some weakness, we are brought down and that’s when we fail.  That was the one of very clear incident when I discover that, every human has more power to do than the average usual stuffs that we do, all we fail is to recognize our own potential.
Yeah after an hour, I guess almost around 3:30 pm we reached there at Bhutan embassy, had talk and discuss with the person who deals with the VISA and he gave the very detail explanation and he offered the help too. Which then after so long and tiring day, it was like an answer come true to the question that we struggled for a day.
After that, I reach back to university, took a short nap and was just thinking about the day and I was at least satisfied helping him, and yeah the lesson was big. You know, the early morning, even if I am going with him to help his work, I felt so uneasy as I was financially crunched and that totally don’t let me to be the real me, but as mid of day passed and seeing the script lying, it was like an answer, because strength is really a life and weakness is death.
Yeah everyone has the power to do more than what we do every day, but most of us get feared easily when things don’t gather peacefully. That’s what we are stopped constantly from doing something bigger than the big.  As such there is nothing to get off, all we need is to get prepare whole time smiling and being happy , because life has been that way always and no one can change. Life itself is an obstacle.