AFTER 4YEAR.

I couldn’t even stand enough with sufficient energy to digest.     What is so irresistibly tearing?  

Along the twist and turns of journey, infinite numbers of barrier for infinite time put me through some hard times but I would always cope with what I can’t adjust, I stand tall when I must, and of all I would never break down myself for life is always beads of battles but this time it was a different story.  

Crawl on the chest, cold in the ceiling of heart, wrestling spin in my head, pressurized tie inside belly suddenly shaken me like serious earthquake attack beating my resistance. It was a sudden tremor that tore me completely.

On 29^th of December 2015, I was at Phuentsholing to receive my parents (including my grandparents from village) who were on the way to Bodhgaya for religious trip.  Indeed, I was very much excited to see all of them, as it has been long duration away from home.   But as lives being meet by uncertainty as it takes the drive for its next turn, upon seeing them I couldn’t even stand enough with sufficient energy to digest, that I can’t keep my tears intact. Yes, definitely I was happy meeting all of them, but gravity of sadness pulled me more sinking into sorrows.

Who walks slower even than the snail?  

My grandparents were old but they were strong, strong enough to carry bundle of firewood on the back of one hour journey, sufficiently strong that they can finish digging acres of land and In fact I did even clearly saw the brilliant light in aged face when I last meet them, before I join my college at Delhi.

After long four years, on 29 December I met and receive them from the taxi parking. I was happy meeting them after long time, but more of it saddened me thoroughly looking at their condition.  Eyes were blurred, that they hardly recognize me. Legs were weakened like rickets that struggle to carry heavy body weight, and it took like almost an hour to reach guest room, which takes less than ten minutes for me. They walk slower than snail with the growing age.

By then the very night, my sleepiness has fled far away. Thoughts were like on highest boiling temperature burning my head, and I really couldn’t believe that my grandparents has reached to that situation, but later with the rumble in head ceasing with enveloping night with cold filling up every void in the room reaching even on my body under blanket, I came to realize time has moved so fast and that’s how life will invite all of us.

On this New Year Eve, firstly I dedicate this poor piece to my grandparents and parents who always make me feel special. Secondly I send my prayers to all the sentient to alleviate them from sorrows and sufferings and lastly I send this  message to the whole world;  time move so fast, faster that sometimes we even fail to notice until truth collides with reality, so when you’re alive, strong and energetic, do something worth which would help all the sentient beings.  

STORM WILL FADE.

Inflicted bruises must be excruciating,

With whole of skin prickling,

And heart bleeding.

The loudest of voice you wanted to scream,

With those tremors like calamities

Must be on chest caked.

and those,

Fires of hopes must be in despair,

and dreams shriveled like autumn fall.

Slowly your parts must be degrading,

and sooner neglecting,

And with those resistance collapsing,

Like falling walls.

An anthem of hatred and blames would be on your lips,

Through the rides of upheaval.

But yet you would find more aggravating as you hold.

You saw those countless sunset and sunrise,

And exactly in the morning you know sun will smile.

But you forgot one thing;

Sun will also rise within us too and darkness will fade.

Undress those hold and infectious thoughts,

For thy naked heart would sing an anthem of peace.

 

HUMAN ADDICTION.

What is the most human addiction?

Have you ever thought of what you’re most addicted to?or know what humans are most addicted to?

Lately with coldest winter on rule, coldest sweet kiss even reaching bone has made me never wanted to get out of my room.  Even the top list among what I do most has been withered, like those of playing football or hanging out with friends.  Most of the time, I would be hidden like those cub in the cave and would exit only when sunshine.  Cold has made me so much addicted into warmth wasting most of my available time inside blanket with my mobile phone and laptop chatting or watching movie.

For like few days, I was on break after my exhausting theory exam and was giving myself  time for rest,  like one or two but it continued  even to a day ahead of my practical exam, In fact practical exams are not bulky as theory exams to study and moreover  it’s taken lightly in my college which due to the fact, I wasted all of my time totally doing nothing.

Unlike those of usual days, with no choice I woke up early  and got ready for my first exam today reading some necessary stuffs from a manual and luckily I didn’t have to get out of my room to reach till my faculty in early freezing morning as my exams are scheduled at afternoon when winter sun heat is at maximum.  I was whole engaged in studying until last half an hour before exam.

Half an hour slipped with feeding myself with lunch and getting ready collecting necessary materials for my exam and as I open my wardrobe to get lap coat, i was so pissed myself to see unwashed and dirty which I thought of washing a month ago since the last day of my semester class.  i was pissed with my own action that I couldn’t even spend 15 minutes out of so many wasted time for cleaning my own clothes.  However , accepting the truth I went to appear exam without any clouded thoughts.

By then, it was already 6 pm in evening when I came out of practical lab. The evening has enveloped again with cold which fueled my exhaustion. I was tired and yet coldest air has even penetrated through my skin despite the thickest cloth and made me wanted to get back to blanket. However, for the cause of my action I put my time washing bucketful of clothes where I have even forgotten the feeling of cold water.

Getting done with my necessary works, I was back again to my laptop accompanied by some favorite soothing music and busy rubbing my hands to gain the normal temperature.  Suddenly, thoughts about my wasted time emerge and was wondering, why sometime’s thing don’t work as per plan.

Lately, I discovered summer would also keep me most of the time in air conditioned room just like the upcoming winter which made me like cold-phobic and I came to the point;  resting above the altitude higher than what body need was ‘laziness’.

Have you ever thought of what human’s are most addicted?

Even more than the drug addiction, even more than alcoholic addiction, I feel laziness is the mother of all addiction. Look around, keep an eye to any individual irrespective of status or gender, you would see the most addiction would be laziness. In this 21^st century, laziness has become invisibly serious addiction causing  undiagnosable problem sometimes.

I strongly believe that more than anything, humans are addicted so much to laziness which they sometimes even forget to take their proper basic meals. Laziness as mother of addiction for human give so many serious consequences which lead to the major problems in our daily activities.

Experiment yourself with this few questions.

Have you ever came across when you couldn’t finish your work on time?

Have you ever met a situation when your plan fails terribly?

Have you ever gave a thought why people in this present arena are most suffering from lifestyle diseases? 

To my discover, what I believe is laziness is the root causes of many major problem which has become epidemically viral in this modern society.

“Laziness grows on people; it begins in cobwebs and ends in iron chains. The more one has to do, the more he is able to accomplish.”

FADED WEAPON.

‘ I hate distance and will do now and forever……….’

With those clench knots in belly,  with those frozen bite on four chambered walled organ,  I could exactly picture her long breath of inhale through those cold crisped lips in reference to her thirst of seeing me.  Suddenly I was limited with words, words lesser than it could complete a sentence. I was frozen not knowing what even to tell to make her believe in reality  and to make her feel good.

Since two years eleven month, beginning 13^th of January when we fall for each other, due to our individual responsibilities of life to shoulder, we have been almost all the time faraway from each other and yet we kept moving despite hundreds of barriers hoping some day would come to take us to a place;     when distance fades, when  we can find each others hand and back, when time show on us to spend every day through joys and laughter. 

Along this journey of twist and turns,waiting's and endurance, harsh and sweet, no matter how challenges find us,  we dust off those which eat our harmony keeping faith in miracle that life give and with our infinite affections for each other.  I admit, Having her in my life is one biggest god gift that I receive and dream come true.

Here is an another story of battle.

She is a innocent sweet lady, spiritually and intellectually gifted woman,  bright and  beautiful. She basically do possess every art that I could call “perfect”.

To see bitter in her face, to see her hurt, to see her through floating waves of blues has always make  me cold. As a girl, her make up of mind is just similar to the rest of females,  who worries, who land up getting tensed,  whose heart is so fragile and sensitive.  Sometime, she land up getting her mind poisoned with those challenges and would share me all those troubles that would pinch me. Most of the time, being faraway, the only weapon that I got would be always my sweetened words of inspirations and support, In fact it would be too insufficient for a sinking heart.

Today on 13^th of December, our love counts to two years eleven month. As usual we were on social app sharing and exchanging stories of what has happened in a day. Through the course, she messaged me  “i wish, you’re here with me on this new year eve. I miss you so much that I hate this distance as always now and forever”  

I was frozen cold upon reading,  it wasn’t a fear of what I can’t do but a sweet pain of not giving her the best what she deserve.  I was limited to words, words lesser than it could complete a word.  Most of the time,  I would always find a word to make her feel good and energetic and moreover she believes so much that I always feel blessed  giving her whole to me. 

Today, even all those  sincere  and genuine words that I use as a weapon when far, has also dried up when I see her sinking heart of so much misses and need.

COMPEER

After queue of long exams which almost derange our brain, yesterday we received one best time like god has granted us a wish to relieve ourselves from all the hard times we have been battling. It was totally magical and i saw everyone in four wall enjoying hard with rhythm of floating music forgetting every single worries in the world, indeed it was marvelous. That's why i believe that, we are blessed in infinite ways even during the harsh times.

Yesterday and today( 10 and 11) of December is birthday of my two close friends. Their birthday was plan in such a way for us by god smartly just right after our long week exhausted exams. I thank their mom and dad for giving birth to this two beautiful soul. By the way it wasn't a reason of you two treating us in the best.  hahah, anyways joke apart.

Let me grasp this chance to disclose and let universe know about them as far as i know spending four years of my college days with this two brother, in fact my words would be too insufficient.

He is cool and one passionate footballer that i have came across in the voyage of my life. He is originally from dagana. He did his higher secondary from one famous school in the kingdom (Drukgyel) and after his best performance as smart kid qualifying for further study, i met with him here at DELHI. He is currently pursuing his final year of bachelor's degree in pharmacy.  He is one such cool guy, who can adjust with every kind of situations and of all, the best thing about him is, he will never worry unnecessarily until it is mean to.   Summing up from hundred and one; 

He is a men with integrity and character,  adaptable to any kind of situations, cool, confident, friendly and a full of passion for what he love. His good name is 'Chimi Wangchuk'

He is gentle and a passionate basketball and volleyball player that i have met in my life. He is originally from samtse and did his higher secondary from the same school.  I met him here at college after his qualification for higher studies. He is currently pursuing his bachelors degree in pharmacy in third year.  He is one gentle men who is friendly, open and honest. 

Out of all, he is full of life, fun loving, intiative, friendly and one such wonderful buddy who would love to do fun with. His good name is 'Roshan Rai.

Four years of spending my time here at college with you two is one biggest part of my life and i will surely do cherish throughout my life.  In deed, i am blessed to have such good friends who help me battle the weather of life.

I pay you my appreciation and token of gift through this poor writing. God bless you both and happiness shower like summer rain evergreen. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOTH OF YOU ONCE AGAIN!

REALIZATION

Its been heavy hours since from the beginning of my final exam when i was glued on my old chair, when i was jailed up in four walls with piles of book for so less time that i have got. 

During this stages of cycle my system was fully acclimatized to waking up early without alarm, sleeping late night burning midnight oil, in fact situation was "so many book for so less time" and i did swallowed all the circumstances of massive pitfalls with all the fuel i got, since i have let most of my available time slip like time can regrow. 

Did you ever ask yourself why things are not abundantly rich at a time? like somehow, somewhere there is a pitfalls. Like when you're distanced, you started missing home. Like when winter come, you started missing summer, when you fail you start regretting like if i have tried little, like i do when i have so less time for my book.

Here is the reality; iterative mediocrity when meet the life, question get solved.

Thousand among millions of us, we insufficiently value when everything is richly blossom around us like conditioned and automated machines where our plates are adapted to the normal life situation of wasting time unnecessarily, taking things for granted and hundred more in the list.

What if we really deal with life? Have you ever once gave a thought beyond your normal thinking brain when you're normal? Have you've ever valued a cup of water when you're hydrated or a bowl of rice when your belly is filled?  Rarely we does.

With my final paper approaching tomorrow, after appearing 4 papers of like thousands of pages, studying about million of drug, bells in my head reverberated louder than usual in totally exhausted body and came to the point of why we actually are not abundantly blessed with wealth of life.

If you avoid life, you'll never understand that:  obstacles are normal series of battle in life to door of abundance harmony.

COLD THIRST.

5 AM, cold winter morning!

When my alarm reverberate to the loudest,

I found myself panting to catch the sufficient volume of cold air,

With the wrestling thoughts of dream in my head

When I first open my eyes from sleep.

There, I was sweating.

With random dream of struggling.

She was a subject of my war.

War irrespective of the daylight and dark.

Indeed, her sum find my all days that come.

Subsequent dream that I fought,

Thrust even my 5 AM pure thought.

She has found me even through the breath,

Extending to the widest of breadth,

An expanse of niche i live, she became my air.

Early 5 AM morning,

Alarm buzzed,

There like antelope riding, dream inflicted suffer of massive loneliness,

Added with sweet urgent miss,

With all those dream to wake up by her side each successive morning.

Even a dream she haunted!!!